The Never Ending Story...Continued...actually coming to an end...so it's not neverending

Guten Tag Leute!

Hello again readers.  So,  I know what you are thinking and yes, it has been a very long time since either Meri or I have updated you on our adventures/crazy lives.

So here is an update on what we have been doing:

Both Meri and I have been super busy.  During Christmas break Meri and I met up in Amsterdam for a New Years celebration.  We spent 4 days there biking, partying, eating, shamelessly walking the streets, and couchsurfing with our friendly, but a little bit strange, host, Fabian.

How to describe Fabian?  He is a little like a wannabe gangster but not so much gangster.  I guess it is hard to say, but just imagine you are staying with a complete stranger that you met online who just opens his home to hundreds of guests a year (he says he's had hundreds) and doesn't know how to use a heater in the dead of winter.  Yeah, that is exactly what Meri and I did.  Fortunately, he turned out to be a pretty normal guy, however, I say normal lightly.  Meri definitely approved of him on the last day.

While we were saying goodbye and getting ready to leave, Meri gave Fabian a parting kiss.  Now I know it was an accident, one went in for a hug while the other a cheek kiss, and one thing led to another and there you have it, lips were locked!  I really can never let her live this one down.  I just wish I had a camera to document and share with all of you.  I really had to just turn around and laugh a little on the inside.

After Amsterdam, and Meri's unfortunate collision with Fabian, we got busy preparing for the end of winter semester and all the dreadful exams that come with it.

February was, well, great.  Meri left for Finland the day after the semester ended for a big party hosted by her home university.  She had a blast seeing all her old friends and her family.  I also left the same day for Valencia, Spain.  I was there for 4 days.  Meri was gone for almost 2 weeks.  Lets just say I missed her loads.

I finally purchased a second or third, maybe even fourth hand bike.  The first day Meri and I hit the road with our bikes together, she was hit with a car.  But don't fret, my readers, it was very lightly and she was not injured.  The guy seemed very sincerely sorry and we went on our way.  The guy even recognized Meri the next day while were were having lunch out and came to apologize once more.

March has been a little bit slower.  The weather has been so good we have spent many of the days out at the park.  The first day out we lost the volleyball in the river.  Our friend, being the good citizen that he is, stripped down to absolutely nothing, and I mean nothing, to jump in the river and retrieve it.  Just think,  we were in a public park set up next to a playground with tons of other people enjoying the first good weather of the year.  Lets just say we got a lot of attention for those few minutes we had a naked guy in our group.

Also I wanted to share with you guys something very special that happened recently.  The neverending story has finally ended.  It happened on a cold rainy night in.  Meri finally got to put her nipple to my bellybutton.  Yes, it is true she was overly ecstatic when I gave her the permission to do it.  She almost didn't believe me.  All you really need to know is that it was about the weirdest most awkward situation I have been in for a while.  I honestly can say that I don't think even Meri enjoyed it that much either.

Well there you have it...an ending to a ridiculous but fabulous memory that I may or may not want to remember.

Oh and today we leave you with this clip.  It's also pretty freaking ridiculous.  Leave some comments and let us know what you think.  I will tell you in both Meri's and my opinions, we do not support her ideas or words.

And of course we couldn't leave without the song of the day:

"I Want It That Way"

Yeah

[Brian:]
It is my vehicle
Not a bicycle 
Believe when I say
Bus is the only way

[Nick:]
But we are few blocks apart
The bus stop is so far
Gotta hurry up  
 3 minutes till the bus comes up

[Chorus:]
Tell me why
I always make the same mistake
Tell me why
I cant even have my coffee break 
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say
"The bus number 1 is always late"

[AJ:]
I do require
That the bus drivers  
Could retire
Then everything would be better! 

[Chorus:]
Tell me why
The busses are always late
Tell me why
There's not even a train on its way
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say
"Fuck you bus driver" everyday...

[Kevin:]
I can't see that - where is the bus?
At the time it should be here YEAAH
No matter the distance
It's so fucking slow
I feel like I have to pee-ee...

[Howie:]
You are my vehicle
Not my bicycle
You are
You are, you are, you are

Don't wanna hear you say
"Lets go to the next bus stop"
"Have to walk" but I have my tank top!? (don't wanna hear you say)
I think I have to get some vodka (oh, yeah)
Why don't they do their job?!

Tell me why
Our bus stop is so bad spot
Tell me why
It takes million years to pick us up
Tell me why
I always have to hurry up (don't wanna hear you say)
Please bus, check the clock.

Tell me why
Our crib feels like a big mistake 
Eichendorffring wasn't ever late
Tell me why
I never wanna hear you say (never wanna hear you say)
"Our bus is always late"

'Cause I want it not to be late.

Lyrics: Meri Forsman

VIDEO COMING SOON !!!

With love,
Meri

Yo man Chicago

Today has been pretty interesting. But first look what Alex found yesterday:

That is a f*cking huge spinach leaf - she's gonna be famous one day FOR SURE 

So today has been a mess. Literally a mess. I was an emo for a second, Alex did her nails and then she became an emo because of the f*cking life and stupid top coat for the nails that doesn't work. Just 10 minutes ago I threw my banana slices in the air and spilled the coffee all around our kitchen table - sorry don't have a photo of that situation, it was pretty funny. Now my knee hurts and I think it's gonna be pretty beautiful at night with the bruise and stuff, ach so. 

Everybody throw your banana slices in the air!

Look at them nails bitches 

Even though all this has happened, we had time to be a little bit feminist and think about women rights and shitty stuff that we have to handle in our lives. So why we would like to be guys:

1. Alex said, that if she was a man she would move to the mountains and be a mountain man. Then she could also be able to do "Brokeback mountain"stuff - AWESOME OR WHAT ?! ps. Heath Ledger, you'll always be in our minds.

2. This is the thing that girls think about every month; why guys don't have periods? Why, why, whyyy....... It costs so much money and we don't even want to have it. 

3. Makeup - this time guys always say "you don't have to have makeup, it's your own choice." Oh yeah, we wouldn't even have this conversation if I didn't wear makeup. 

4. Hair - ok, guys have facial hair BUT girls can't have hair anywhere. So we need much more razors than u do, mister. 

5. Hair - ON OUR HEADS. Usually it's better to have long hair than short - and that's expensive. 

6. Walking on the street - It's f*cking dangerous to walk on the street at night when you're a girl. Especially if you come from the bar and u look nice - then u can't even hide it that you're a girl. Guys can walk on the streets when ever they want, also naked if they want! If girls walked on the street naked it would be "hello rapers" for us. 

7. Assumptions - girls have to clean, do food, take care of the kids... It is proven, that the people that stay at home and don't go to work are more likely to suffer from depression. 

Ok, I'm not gonna continue this feminist blog text, because after all we love being a woman. I think we'll never stop complaining how unfair it is for being a woman - we just have to suck it up and be as fabulous as we can. Even though it's f*cking expensive. 

With love,
Meri

Ps. Today we're going to have a lot of fun in the Audimax party! 

Okeyy aaaand YouTube doesn't want want to work with me. So fuck you YouTube. Ah, it's going to be such a good night. 

The story of kidnapped Alex

It was a normal Monday night, which means Ulenspiegel party. Alex put herself ready for the night but this time I decided to stay at home. She left, I went to sleep.

This morning I woke up; my alarm was set at 7.15 like always, and I was ready to do my morning porridge. Alex and I are shearing the same bed (nothing sexual, just the cheapest way to get a good bed) and every morning I'm trying to wake up really quietly so that I don't wake her up. This morning she wasn't there, she hadn't came home last night. What had happened?

I run out of the bed and checked the apartment - nothing. Not her coat, not her shoes, not her keys on the table. She hadn't come home and I know she wouldn't have gone to no-ones place to be filthy. 

I texted and called everyone - "where is Alex?" "were you late last night?" "was she drunk?". Thoughts went trough my head; maybe she decided to walk back home from the bar (because that stupid motherfucking thing does that, she doesn't have karate moves, I don't know how she is brave enough to do that kind of shit; walking alone on the scary Frankfurterstraße, psycho) and someone kidnapped her, or raped her, or she fell asleep on the street... I was worried and almost shitting my pants. 

I still decided to go out for morning run, but it didn't work out that well. I was just watching all the streets and thinking that everyone that passed me buy had taken Alex. I was sure that someone had buried her in the forest... And then this scary little fucker idea came to my head: our apartment. The nice people who gave us this apartment.

 Alex had told me how it's very unsafe to be american citizen, that there are people who are willing to kidnap you. I remember how surprised we were, when we were still looking for an apartment and our current landlord called us about they're having an open house. We didn't even remember about contacting them about the apartment, but we went to the open house and got it. 

Maybe our landlord was involved in Alex's kidnapping? They had been spying our house...? Maybe they were working for some kind of group?

So, Alex was gone. I came back from my morning run and went to have my private time in the "powder room" that has now toilet paper. I was just gonna start to cry and was texting with Dan when suddenly I heard noise coming from the hallway. Someone opened our front door - ALEX YOU MOTHER FUCKER.       

If I hadn't been sitting, I would have ran to Alex and hugged and kissed her. I was so relieved, she wasn't dead! Our landlord isn't evil, she is still amazing! 

Apparently Alex had stayed the night over our friends place - she was too tired to walk back home (and she still doesn't have those karate moves) and too broke to call the cab. 

Thank you rapers that you didn't take my dear roommate. 

Now Alex is very sorry for making me worried. And she cut her hair - not because I asked her to do it. 

This beautiful dance is for you, dear readers. Alex is doing that shit a lot.

With love,
Meri and the non-kidnapped Alex

Take me to the candy shop

Alex just went back to bed - Im here listening to Shania Twain. Damn, she's a genius! Gotta love these beautiful and tasteful videos. Thank you daddy for introducing me to Shania Twain when I was about 6 years old.  

For me Halloween is over. My costume is covered in all kinds of alcoholic drinks and smells like tobacco and hotdogs. I'm so glad that we don't celebrate Halloween in Finland - yet. I think next year I'll just try to do the trick or treat and go to ghost haunting ! This kind of lifestyle that you sleep approximately 5 hours every night doesn't suit for me. 

I dont like kids, especially babies, but this is funny 

I'm really tired and I want to go to bed also. I have to go to party to Frankfurt tonight with Annika and I feel like I weight about 5890289 kg and smell like 872646 hotdogs. I'm such a lady 

I'm just gonna post a little summary about our Halloween. No words, just pictures. Enjoy you little bunnyrabbitreaderkisskisselephant and I can assure you that we come in to your dreams. Peace and blessings 

Just had to post this photo, because Alex doesn't like old people. These are some random grannies + grandpa

ROUND NUMBER 2 

YEAP that was it. We had so much fun and we got to know some new people. Thank you german people who wanted to talk with us and encouraged us to talk german! And a big thank for the amazing minicar driver, who took us to Tannys party from Marktplatz. You're amazing!

Ps. I'm really sorry that this post isn't funny. I'm not working well right now - maybe next week Alex will post a stupid video about us. Probably, I don't promise anything.

With hotdogarmits love,
Meri

It's the hotdog armpits day!

We want to announce that that singer is one fucking hot motherfucker. And this is an awesome song. Enjoy, don't be an EMO.

With awesome hangover love,
Meri & Alex

Happy Rainbow Unicorn Poop

So hello our happy readers!

Halloween is coming and we're panicking about it - just like every day when we're going to the bus stop. Why the bus is always on time when we are late? Like today; we had to go to our german abend class and the bus was fucking 20 minutes late. Because of that I had to stand the nasty look from my german teacher. GERMANY, YOU'RE DRUNK again.

But happy thoughts!

First of all; I want to announce that we DID our laundry on Sunday! 

Alex working that ass even when she's asleep 

But it wasn't that enjoyable laundry night because my ice lolly dropped on the floor

The sunday laundry experience was so much better than the last one in Unterhof. Now I will tell you the whole story, the laundry night at Unterhof -story. Brace yourselves.


On Tuesday night we came back home from Unterhof. We had been sitting the night at our friends place and decided to walk back home, because it takes about 20 minutes. It was really dark and windy, like u can imagine a horror story, it was like that. Suddenly a black cat crosses the street - oh fuck. We didn't even spit over our shoulders! And because of that mulkku musta kissa our lives were ruined.

On Wednesday morning we were ready. It was one of those normal Wednesdays, the day in the middle of the week. We had planned this journey for one day, it was the first laundry day at Unterhof.
We had packed our laundry to our IKEA bags and took the bus number 1 to Berliner Platz. The bus was on time and we were two happy campers waiting for the Unterhof bus that was coming in 2 minutes - perfect! But then the black cat came to the picture; we missed that bus just because we were so excited about seeing Shannon who had came back from Ireland. Well, we just had to wait for the another bus to come, which took about 20 minutes. And that was the black cat -issue number 1.

Finally we got in to the bus. We got seats and we were happy campers again. The Unterhof stop was near and we prepared our selves for going out of the bus. The bus stopped, we pushed the button... Aaand the black cat came to the picture again! The fucking door didn't open, even though we pushed the button like 892837 times. We had to go all the way to Naturwissenschaften and walk from there with our big ass IKEA bags. The black cat -issue number 2.

We went down to Unterhof to do our laundry. We were tired of carrying those heavy IKEA bags and pissed off because of the black cat. We put our shit to the machines and wanted to pay - the machines didn't have numbers on them (if u live in these amazing dorms that Gießen has to offer, u know how to pay for doing your laundry) and we just had to guess which machine is what. The black cat -issue number 3.

The washing machines were supposed to be done after 45 minutes. During the machines were doing their thing, we decided to do some grocery shopping because we didn't have any food at our place. Grocery shopping was nice, and everything was fine. UNTILL we came back to Unterhof; someone had taken my laundry out of the washing machine and had put it on the laundry table - known also as "filled with international bacteria -table", and I hate bacteria. The black cat -issue number 4.

We put our "clean" laundry to the dryers and went home to put the groceries to the fridge. We came back to Unterhof and I found my laundry from the international bacteria table... And they weren't even dry yet; someone had taken my laundry out of the dryer and had put his/her laundry to the dryer instead. All the dryers were in use at that moment so I had to make my own journey to the other laundry place in Unterhof where my laundry was getting dry eventually. Alex also had to pay her dryer twice, because apparently the dryers weren't working that well. While waiting for the dryers to finish, we had to check the other dryer that had my laundry in it in the beginning. It was finished and we took it out... We took out just one little blue towel with pink dots on - like WTF?! Who wants to pay 1€ for drying one pathetic towel?! Who wants to take a bagful of wet clothes from the dryer and replace it with one towel?! Like this is the time, when you have another chance to think about the whole thing again - "do I really want to pay 1€ for drying this towel?" The black cat -issue number 5.

I know, I'm an evil person. But it was just because of the situation. I'm truly sorry, if someone felt bad after reading this - if it's you or your friend... I'm sorry. Well at least you can try to clone me, because I kissed that paper. Meri number 2, parteyyy 

Yes, I left that message for the towels owner. I really feel bad about it now, but I think it's still funny. Everyone can take a little joke, right?

Our little laundry day took us for five hours. We were exhausted. We were sad. We were ready to destroy all of the black cats out there. Five fucking black cat -issues. BE AWARE!  

And now Alex wants us to buy this kitten: 

She's out of her mind. All cats are evil. We're just gonna get two gold fish: Mac and Cheese. 

On last Friday I was on my regular run and I saw that black cat again. It was terrifying. 

BUT BACK TO HAPPY THOUGHTS:

WE HAVE TOILET PAPER poopie time, peace man 

The tango of the black cat 

Here is some inspiration for Halloween. You can also see those amazing subtitles on the Wrecking ball video - is it spanish? Black cat, Miley Cyrus or YouTube - hard choice...

Happy Halloween, peace and blessings! Watch out for those black cats out there, they're evil.

With Love,
Meri

It's Sunday....in Deutschland

Ok so for all you people who do not live and have never been to Deutschland(Germany) here is a little explanation of why Sunday in Deutschland is such a big thing:

ABSOLUTELY ALL THE SHOPS ARE CLOSED ON SUNDAY!

So in most peoples minds you would think, "Great a day I can be super productive and get so much stuff done like homework and housework and other miscellaneous random ass shit that I procrastinated doing during the week because I've just been to busy to even try to do it." That is not the case for Meri and I.  Here is a little look at our day that we should be doing shit that we need to do:

This is what I find when I come from the bathroom.

Highest level of Procrastination achieved. (Along with some salad dressing).

Procrastination!

We have been talking about doing our laundry for a week.  Sunday is usually laundry day in the Almer Forwie household.  Still procrastinating that one.

We would rather do shit like this.

my reaction to the above picture :)

 Oh yeah and we ran out of toilet paper.  It's sunday......

 

Meri really has to shit!

And just a little look at what we are listening to:

So basically Sundays are a fun filled day of procrastination and doing stupid shit that makes no sense to anyone but us! Peace and Blessings from this crazy bitch :)

With love Meri and Alex!